Thursday, August 20, 2015

<<< au revoir brother >>>

Us girls are sprawled in the back of the car with books to take us to different worlds. I disappeared into 200 pages of mine, hours dragging by. We make it to the college campus, an interesting place for a writer. All around there are nervous looking teens and teary eyed moms and I keep putting myself in their shoes, trying to imagine what it might be like. That was enough to interest me through the long lines and traffic, that and my book. 

Then, we have to say goodbye.

He's nervous, but he'll be fine. 

So at last we leave and wave even though we can't see him. 
That's when the tears come. I never cry around people and I have a book to distract me, so my eyes 
 are dry, but others cry. 

We stop for ice cream. It's some of the best ice cream I've ever had, but somehow it's sweet creaminess can't soften our moods, so we climb back into the car and let more miles and miles separate us from our brother. 

It's a first, and firsts are terrifying, so were all holding our breath and hoping everything will turn out ok. It will. God is here. 

Then the sky falls and every crystal of light is smothered behind the horizon. 

We make it home and argue about who should take the pup out. It was our brother's job. 

Letting brother go to college isn't sad because I will miss him. 
I will, 

s o m e t i m e s , 

but the sadness is more complex.

It's the pain of stepping back and being left behind. That's what hurts. It's the pain of looking forward at two more years of high school without all those friends who left for college, without my brother, without a boy in the house. That hurts. 

But, on a brighter note, I have plenty of goals to keep me busy. My junior year will be different, very different. That's ok. God is here. 

So there is an update.

< < < Latest news: Our family is growing up > > > 

<3 storyteller


  1. *Sniff* Man, even though I've got a sister in collage, she never left. She does online collage so she stays home. Sometimes I'm really mad and angry at her and wish she had left to go to collage... but- now, I'm blessed to have her by my side all the day long, even if she does tease me A LOT and Its annoying... I can live with it.

    I'm so sorry Madeline. Someday It will be all over! <3 <3

    1. <333 I love you Isabel, thank you sweetie!

  2. I just went throught the same thing today. :'(